The era of the divorced and others.....?

In my age group I'm what you might call a unicorn... In my lifetime I've never been married nor had kids. Now don't expect me to update you on my age, look at the bio and do some arithmetic.... I digress. Back to what I was saying regarding being a unicorn. What makes me even more of a rarity is the fact I've been engaged a couple of times and decided to break them off, stories for another time! I've never wanted to have kids out of wedlock, for selfish reasons really.... I just did not want to end up raising a child alone! Raising kids is HARD work, marriage is HARD work and no wants to do either alone, I just never found anyone who understood this and was willing to make the commitment and stick to it no matter what! I'm old fashioned like that...and I also like a guy whose a gentleman. Mmmh...the bygone era of true gentleman.

Lord this blog reads like a dating profile, not at all intended! Anyway last week I was chatting to a friend who was telling me that he was divorcing his wife after 15 years of marriage. This is an old friend, we have known each other since high school, but the first thing that came to my mind was "fuck I'm at the dating divorcees and widowers stage!". Karma really is a motherfucking female dog, I remember when I was younger and was making fun of spinsters who attended funerals and churches just to troll for vulnerable men. Now this call suddenly brought that reality crashing down.

In high school i had a teacher who liked to remind us that the high school and varsity years were the ones for finding your " man" and that if you haven't pinned one down after these stages then you'll be fighting a loosing battle. For some reason this stuck in my mind and I spent most of my young adult life doing everything to prove that teacher wrong!....and it sucks that I'm making this connection as I write this shit!

I was a party animal and never had a relationship that lasted more than 2 years. I've always had an aversion towards church and funerals and am now wondering whether it stems from this.....? Maybe on a subconscious level I was aware of this and hence the reluctance and resistance to attending them.

Yeah, I know I'm selfish, he is telling me about the end of his life and I'm thinking of me. I told you I was selfish, so this should come as no surprise but you forget I'm a woman, I multitask. Of course I acted like any friend would in the situation, lend an ear.

Now the question I ask myself is, what am I to do with this newfound insight? Will I join in with others of my kind in the constant quest to find my one and only? Oh please who am I kidding, I've never been the conforming type and am not going to start now. I welcome this new phase in my life and I'm sure it will at least provide me with material for even better blogs.

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